the sham wow guy got arrested for beating up a hooker.
Apparently oprah and I were in competition to see who's ass could get bigger this summer
well when i got there she was attempting to stick the cat in her mouth.. so maybe you should go check on her
nothing like a negative hiv test and a bag of condoms to brighten my day.
she did the YMCA with her lgs... i think she forgot she wasnt wearing any underwear
i was so worried that when his hands were down my pants he was going to find the weed i stole from him
I have no idea. After the fireworks it all went to shit. Do you know why I woke up with a road sign?
I just got my inseam measured in raffle tickets by a drag queen. Being fondled for charity is awesome.
you can think of my virginity as your little souveneir from our relationship.
There is an alarming amount of urine in here.
I mean, who doesn't have an ex involved with bath salts?
The hardest part about being a child of divorce is when you're at your dad's house but your condoms are at your mom's house.
Getting a blow job while breaking up with my gf helps cope with the pain... Kinda weird her best friend is giving me the BJ
Why is everyone giving me a hard time for drinking?!
Your in the library.
I blacked out after the piñata full of condoms
Randomize
