the other night i did but this one wasnt and it was so random. i was hooking up with this boy who wanted to roleplay and pretend to be snakes
I can't even teach it... It's just natural slutyness.. My mom has it too
Beer bonged 7 shots of Jameson. I title this night short stories with tragic endings.
The coffee from our coffee maker just hasn't tasted normal since we made Mac n cheese in it that one time....
the welcome home hickey he left on my boob is really gunna put a damper on the rest of my thanksgiving hook up plans with the rest of my ex's
they still hired me even though my background check came back with a warrent for my arrest.
he has decreed that i can sleep with anyone who has the same name as him. line up all the toms
oh, so if i go friday and she's there, you are going to be my sponsor for not banging the crazy chick
Goldenshlager is a hell of a drink. And these are the adventures ur missing out on w me. I gave someone a bath Emily. A BATH.
Awkward
Can't say I wouldn't let it happen again.
Paige is home safe.
Actually, she's here now, punching me in the face. You should've kept her keys.
Once he bit me I drew the fucking line.
So...I maybe walked across campus last night with my life size Joe Biden cut out.
"You can have sex in my class, just stay quiet. I don't like noise." My professor... Shall make for an interesting semester.
I think my liver just tried to kill me, we need to slow down
I'm sorry, but if I hear stories of you getting fingered in the ass, and selling weed, you are not coming to my party.
Randomize
