She was lying the whole time!
She was a great actress
I was a great dumbass
I blacked out, fell off a swingset, and thought I was Liz Lemon for almost an hour.
Don't you ever say "drinking at 2" as if it's a bad thing again. I'm asking you as a friend here.
if i find out your the one who pierced my belly button im going to fuck your sister again
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hurricane my ass. I'm riding a god damn kayak down the flooded highway if it's the last god damn thing I do, god damnit.
I tried to say goodbye but you were hugging a trash can and I wasn't sure if you had clothes on
I like how I get messages from eharmony at the same time I'm looking for a new vibrator. It's like the powers that be are just trying to make my life ironic.
The thing i'm gunna miss the most about college is peeing while brushing my teeth in the shower without being judged. You just can't do that anywhere else
How do you tell someone who's buying a pregnancy test to have a nice day .... Like how
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Its summer. Time to get to the freshmen before the weight does.
Long story short he broke into a preschool and threw all their cones into a tree.
Please brint me miilk. I am on the floor but my door is open. Thank you, i appreciate u verry much.
OHMYGOD I LITERALLY JUST FINISHED JERKING OFF AND MY MOM BUSTS IN AND HANDS ME A BABY WHAT THE FUCK IS GOING ON IN MY HOUSE JESUS H CHRIST!
Turns out he's just a recently divorced IT guy. Not a wizard.
not only did he puke in his mouth and hold it.. He also sneezed while doing this
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