Oh my god you would drunk register for a marathon.
over or under 1pm before my bracket is too blurry to read?
Nope. If I'm going to drive an hour to fuck a teacher, it will NOT be missionary thats for damn sure.
I don't miss having sex with him. We had our finale fuck last week. He's all yours now.
I think we need a list of things that are automatic NO's for dating a guy. Married, definitely a no now
I mean honestly, I love naps like Anthony Weiner loves sending dick pics
Says the girl who left her friends to go have phone sex in the bathroom at Michael's
Denim handjobs are the worst handjobs. I hate all handjobs. Why do people even.
When dressing for a 3way, how do I convey to the other chick I care enough to look pretty but not so much that it's a huge deal?
Is there a hallmark card for "could you please slide the FUCK out of my DMs"....?
His acid is intense dude. I was just over at his place laughing about the hole in the wall I was convinced was a cat
i woke up this morning wearing my pants as a scarf and my shirt as a daiper, my boyfriends contact name in my phone is "human sacrifice" and yours is "i like eggs"....can someone please tell me what happened last night
I don't know what to say to you.
I don't know what I said to you. Start with that.
Nxt time we drink that much, we'll have to hide the crayons. Crayola-ing a mural on the living room wall wasnt the brightest idea, but it sure is classy. Right?
My new superpower is making fuckboys disappear!
Bending dicks and egos since 2002
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