We need to find a way to make penises more like hookahs.
He wouldn't know what to do with his penis even if they made a "how to get a blowjob for dummies" guide
NEVERCLEAR, NEVER AGAIN.
i think he saw me take a picture of his dick
I want a MapMyFart App, where I can mark every spot where I have ripped one. Like here.
I figured working in my office on the 34th floor I'd be safe railing xanax off my desk. Of course, I snort it just in time for the window washer guy to give me a thumbs up.
I'm trying. I feel like we're trying to have sex with fruitcake. dry and boring.
my goal for the rest of college is to escape STD free. fuck getting a job. this is more important.
We just fucked like crazy and now I'm dipping chips in macaroni & cheese. I feel completely accomplished. This may be the best day ever.
How do I say "I want to suck your balls" in a classy but sexy way,
I'm like a saiyan, every time I get trashed I come back stronger
I couldn't have possibly been that bad
You had her flip the penny over to the lucky side before you picked it up and ate it...
So I was having a really bad night...so I decided to steal a pumpkin.
can jess come too?
sure! but I don't have enough booze for the both of you.
she comes with her own booze, no worries.
it will be a surprise...all I can say is stripper clown.
Randomize
