Disadvantage of being gay..... my gag reflexes makes trying to make myself throw up extremely difficult.
she said i was amazing, then i left to room to take the rubber off and came back to find her masturbating with my xbox controller while niko got a call from roman.
I woke up, not remembering how or when or why i was even there and looked over to find Steph spooning with an adult black man.
He told me he was 'pondering the natural wonder that is my ass'
Like, dude. I'm already fucking you, you don't need to wax poetic.
Isn't he wasted enough that he might actually mean it and not just be trying to get you to fuck him without a condom?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
21st Birthday Idea: liquor store gift registry. Give me a promotion.
I gave ten strangers a full description of his penis and its abilities. I need to stop drinking.
Typcal friday morning so far. Puke, shower, commute/puke, coffee, puke, coffee, bagel, good to go. Lunch today?
If I can't pick up a cat lady, I probably need to turn to Internet dating.
Just seen a lady with the back of her head shaved and the rest of her hair in a pony tail like a sumo wrestler with a 6 inch glass dolphin hair clip. Nothing is going to ruin my day.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Honestly it's a super power. I can try it a million different ways and nothing happens. Donnie casually says "ok this is now a toppless party" and it all kicks-off
It's the happiest looking penis I've ever seen. It should have a top hat and a spectacle on and soft shoe across the room with a cane. He's a cheery little feller.
I just wanted to be nice to your dick and you are rhyming at me.
I appreciate alcohol much more now that I have to be sober sometimes
i can do like, 15 pushups. 20 if i listen to dubstep.
I wish I could open myself up and check on my liver. Make sure it's hanging on. Ya know?
Randomize