we made out on top of his cat.
at least franzia made me throw up pretty colors.
Out of ice. Vodka+club soda+cut up lime popscicle=I'm an alcoholic genius.
Held my professor's hair back while she was puking. I'd better get an A out of this or else the pics are going on Facebook.
The bouncer was being really rude for no reason. Steph PICKED him up and physically MOVED him from our path on the way out.
Well thats the pro of going out drinking with a pro body builder. Even if its a girl.
Did u see the proverb she left as a comment on my picture?
He ate shrooms at 9:30, said, "see you later," and left. I am alone on New Years.
I'm wearing too many socks to be ok with this.
Peeing out the car window on the way home was a nice touch. In December, in Michigan, at 3am. Never seen a girl do that before. Neither had the guy in the minivan next to us.
He wouldn't stop calling me so I sent him a text saying "I'm dead. Dead. Leave me alone." And he replied with "so can I see you then?"
just reached the point where my breast implants paid from themselves in free drinks.
He's like a Lana del Rey song that took human form
Is it tacky to frame a negative pregnancy test?
Things could not have gone more poorly if I had stripped naked and run through the Sahara with sirloins tied to my vagina.
If I'm able to walk tomorrow morning, I'm gonna be really disappointed with myself...
Randomize