Really? You have stories that rival having a threesome with the two best friends of the guy your kinda seeing? Thats impressive.
don't worry, i have a range rover and a brother hopped up on steroids.. we can solve this little misunderstanding quite easily.
Hes sobering up now. He was just really bad for like 45 minutes. He cried while he was telling me how he pictured us eating hotdogs on the beach together..
I woke up with a solved rubics cube in my purse
I hope he doesn't find the chex mix when he takes my shirt off.
Found out why I didn't have to go drug test. My boss grew pot to pay for grad school.
You do resemble something that has been used as a chew toy.
Is this the 6 foot tall blonde I screwed in the bar last weekend?
In the bar?! Very impressive! But keep guessing!
Seriously insulted!! You can not share my dick pick with your gay brother. He won't quit poking me on fb
Just checking to make sure you weren't kidnapped, pregnant or watching Fox News.
You've been dating this guy for a month now and as your best friend I have to complain that I still don't how big his dick is.
You know you need to get it together when a frat guy wakes you up and says you need to go to class
So, anyways, aside from wanting to seduce my roommate for booze, how's everything been
The smoothie place is closed, but the liquor store is open and wine is kinda like a smoothie.
i think we reached that point in our drunkenness where even the creeps found us intolerable
Randomize
