I am pretty sure the guy in the stall two dwn from me is jerking it...seriously
You were partners with her mom and you began calling her "the Robert Horry of beer pong" You also kept telling her that she was hotter than her daughter.
It's not normal to lose a tooth eating a McDouble.
i woke up surrounded by junior mints. not to mention, there was a huge pyramid of natty cans baracading the door shut. this is why i can't drink alone.
You should make it a point to use vocabulary that is competition appropriate around him, like "champion" and "training" and "victory sex"
Somebody found our where I was and called the bar looking for me. When the bartender called my name I finished my beer and took off like a fugitive.
He walked into the pizza shop... Pulled the fire alarm.. And proceeded to dance to it...
Don't come. It's not even a party it's a total sausage fest. Like 20 drunk dudes in a bedroom. We can still drink by ourselves though it'll be ok
Just found out i over drew my checking account on a 711 hot dog
Do u remember buying that
I remember eating it on the curb like a drunken hobo
You had sex with a mute, how is that not funny
You wouldn't believe how many pro-life stickers, and "show us your tits" signs there are between here and Dallas.
She said I'm going to get you stoned and have you fuck me on the couch.
I don't think "growing medical marijuana" is Quite what my Grandfather had in mind when he thought me about gardening as a child
You just can't go back to being friends with someone after you sucked their balls
It was only a blow job in his car. It's the same as giving a friend a back rub.
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