Every time there's an awkward silence a gay baby is born
great time with ya sorry i wasn't one of the three guys you wanted to stay with
He told me he finished so fast because he's a sprinter. I hate athletes who are really just pussies.
we're havin a 400 loko party for joe pa's 400th win. come get loko
Okay, we really need to start training for the St Pattys parade. 48 hours of green beer won't end well if we don't prep ourselves. 2 week bender starts now
sorry for allegedly lighting the beer pong balls of fire
I really want to shower but i'm afraid i'll sober up. My mouth feels like a stripper pole too...
I want to get my vag crammed with complete loss of every bit of dignity I have left by this man from every angle on every flat surface that exists. That is all.
I have no idea, but there's a bus parked in front of my house and like 6 texts saying im gonna prove my love. this is either really really awesome or really really bad.
To sum up. The glass blower from the ren faire ate me out last night. Best ever. Go find yourself an artisan.
Wednesday is my day of reflection and making my dick and balls into shapes. So i'll be pretty busy.
And that's why we do second round interviews for possible roommates.
Cuz I feel like I ate the whole candy isle at 7/11 last night and chased it with rum
You pretty much did tho
Bro i pulled the fucking willy wonkas gold ticket of ratchets the other night this chick was a real treat god bless her
YALL MOTHERFUCKERS WANNA WATCH HEAVY METAL AND SMOKE WEED AND PLAY POOL AND DRINK BEER AND SMOKE WEED
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