remember that night jesus turned water into wine? DRUNKER.
so i told my doctor my symptons and she just shook her head at me
pretty sure that I broke my nose during sexting. Life is grand.
I decided that just having that story under my belt and being able to tell it to my grandchildren is worth the regrets of the evening.
dude that bald bouncer just did a body shot off of brian and then kicked us out for trying to charge him for it
She was puking in a plastic bag while cleaning where she puked on the floor. She knows how to multitask.
And now I'm drinking leftover wine in the grad lounge because fuck my life
Sneaking the vodka in was the easy part.. listening to medley of puking in the porta pottys was not
My roommate is downstairs drunk, smoking, and listening to a self help DVD. Please dear God don't let this be the Ghost of Christmas Future.
My cat just smacked my blunt from my hand and then put her head in my hand. I don't know how to feel
Elliott peed on my floor and slept in it lol that's a one line description.
If I'm going to keep blacking out this much I need to start taking more pictures.
Oh no. Did we do a blood oath again?!
He and his ex stood there talking about going to get Chinese food while I was half naked searching for my panties
Yeah I either headbutted a street sign while texting or I defended you two from an evil gang of nazi muggers. I was black out so I am gonna assume it was option b.
Randomize
