theres a middle aged lesbian couple holding hands on the bus and a 17 or 18 year old christian girl visibly staring freaked out and audibly praying about it
i just walked downstairs to find my brother wearing a crossingguards vest and boxers. when i asked him where he got it he just looked at me, smiled, and kept feeding the dog yogurt
So apparently I shook her hand very polite, said weiner and walked away
One last question would your parents let me sleep in your bathtub for the night?
I mean, I know going to rehab probably didn't make her a lesbian, but I can always hope
Well when you get back to your computer, there's a nice explanation of pansexuality on your Skype.
Oh yea... In other news I've decided to get an external hard drive and start getting music from all the guys I'm fucking... Do you think a terabyte would be enough storage space?
It was going great until he started saying "ooh kill em" under his breath with each thrust
I gave a handjob to the beat of uptown fuck last night
we need to tell them stories about when happens when we're sober so they think they know what they're in for when they're actually completely unprepared for whn happens when we get drunk
I just got a robo call from the Addiction Help Line. Not sure how to take that.
we had sex in his office so i figured it was appropriate to like his company's page on facebook
yeah, but I wanna be the girl that makes him realize he's 100% gay
Just found a pair of vomit-soaked socks in my purse, three days after the party... Now I know why my wallet was wet.
Yup we found her. The bouncer was carrying her out
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