No stds, not pregs, and lost two pounds. I'd call that a successful two years of grad school.
He had a seizure when i was giving him head. for a second i was thinking i was doing a spectacular job
Smoked a joint and chugged some pepto. Feeling a lil better... Not sure which is working..... Gonna keep doing both.....
If Dave says he's going to have sex with her, he's going to fuck her retarded and turn her crazy. So run.
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Drinking vodka in the bathtub.... If I don't make it, I thank you for your magical parts
We played alot of beer pong and ventured into the woods with tiki torches
you 2 were alone in the living room and the dog walked in and you started yelling what are all these people doing in here
Just had a VERY VIVID visualization of wrapping a pizza around my cock and fucking its brains out. Soooooo less weed more dates?
you got to sleep with him and don't even remember it? that's like sleeping through an entire vacation
These 23 People Destroyed Their Entire Lives In An Instant
We smoked before the sunrise hike. I ended up eating a banana and singing Circle of Life as the sun rose over the horizon.
I should probably drink beer instead of rum today so I don't end up naked in my living room while I still have guest.
He stumbled out of the bathroom with his pants around his ankles yelling "tie my shooes!"
I'm starting to think my emotional health is declining because I was watching transformers today and legit almost started crying
And I had on a penis ring on the whole time at dinner. And I ate veal...
SpongeBob is life. I once broke up with a guy bc he said SpongeBob was stupid.