i just hope all the shady shit stops so i can let him into my pants
I just saw a 3 year old try to break out of a daycare by driving a big wheel at full speed into a metal gate. Today is going to be epic.
Tonights theme there is the 7 deadly sins. Greed, envy, sloth, gluttony, sluttiness, fellatio and vodka.
Do you think it'd be inappropriate to have an I'm Not Keeping My Baby Party the day after her baby shower?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I didn't scare your mother by showing up on the roof, did I?
Well apparently I'm no fun since I won't have a threesome with him and my mother.
hes either a crazy bad problem or a crazy good orgasm. I just can't decide which one.
It's okay though. My mom didn't believe that they were mine cuz they were magnums. Having a surprisingly large penis ftw
i didnt have any regrets until i found out he was a freshman.... and the only reason he got into yale was because of soccer... and he wasnt premed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Out of all the people in the house to show their tits at mcdonalds to try and get free food, they picked those two?
I've actually, minus lsat night have actually changed my drinking habits
I told you all we needed steroids to survive the tour de franzia, like the bikers. But nobody listened...
When was the last time you wore pants?
Time is relative.
And pants are optional.
We got drunk and crashed a fifty year old woman's birthday party for the food. Whoops.
That awkward moment when your drug dealer pulls your boss out of the snow
Randomize