come over. we are watching hoarders and playing i spy.
I just got asked if I have a rule for sleeping with people. Like they have to buy me dinner first etc...
On that note, do I have a rule?
We took up a collection and paid her $50 to eat a piece of meat. Vegetarian morals trumped once again by cash.
Your dad needs a mid life crisis affair thing, I could totally be that girl.
If you fool around, take the WHITE sweatshirt off of her first. It's mine, and I don't like your cum nearly as much as she does.
Sorry you called when I was puking in a cheetos bag
What's the appropriate way to phrase "If you ever leave your wife give me a call. But we can still have sex periodically until then."??
We would have taken you home with us, but you were outside the bar measuring a randoms stream of piss by walking along side it... you said you were only at 32 feet and it still had a couple of grooves to hit.
Best part? I know that the likelyhood of this turning into an intimate relationship is like 4.25%
remember when I told you about my grandma asking me about my sex scars? Less comfortable than that
We waved. But it was a "let's hook up" wave.
You can fuck me but I'm keeping my parka on.
Fun fact. I just wrapped myself in wrapping paper for a sext. Is this a new high or a new low stay tuned.
If the amount of time the owner spent looking at my tits is any indication, I’d say I can probably sleep my way to the top
From now on I'd like to be known as Rampage.
Randomize
