How do i ask the guy i made out with for 4 hours if he is gay? He keeps telling me i'm so adorable and that he had a ''blasty''
I think the sex offender registry is kind of a VIP list. You get to not live near noisy schools and parks and all your neighbors get to know you.
You broke her grandpas urn and ran your hand through his ashes claiming it was pixie dust. I think thats why shes mad at you..
you went around and groping mens pants to see "which was worthy" of you to go home with.
did you know that snuggie is the perfect anti-freak out aid for stoners? it weighs you down so you can't go anywhere. just sit there and enjoy the movie, that's right.
I just discovered cum stains from two different guys on my wall. I don't know whether to be proud or horrified.
Well if he truly loves me he will just have to accept my flaws. And that includes a tequila dependency and borderline lesbianism.
so, she was so drunk she tried stabbing me with a corn dog stick
I'm eating my emotions. I am no longer interested in anybody other than my own hand and vagina.
He told me we shouldn't hang out because it would be weird and then snap chatted me a picture of his dick
He came on my favorite pants. He is dead to me.
UVE SEEN MY TITS OKAY STOP CRYING
i'm at work, alone, drinking a spiced chai & fireball hot toddy. holiday OT isn't that bad after all.
you took my virginity. you can't have my alcohol too.
Did you get drunk between now and two texts ago?
Randomize
