I like it. Barfy the gin-flavoured Assman
I was just told by a cop that my party was the most epic party they ever crashed
what's for breakfast?
Advil and throwup
no.. I went home. Puking up hot dogs and lemon tart isn't as lovely as it sounds.
27 Signs That Someone Will Probably Be Bad At Sex
He's either a really good actor or an actual prince, I'm fine with both so I'll sleep with him.
Just found my mom passed out in my bed holding a bag of wine. Not sure if I'm ashamed or proud.
He called his prostate his "boner button".
when you tell me you got me a birthday present, I have to assume it will show up in a drug test.
I would ask why there is a chair tied to the door of the fridge.. but I am not sure anyone knows the answer.
23 Proposal Horror Stories You Won’t Believe
Yeah I should probably start planning our first conversation instead of our first child.
I'm in the middle no shirt white shorts humping the white dustbuster next to the guy shooting off the tazer infront of the two guys humping on the bicycle
Also, beer. Big fan.
I'm definitely not going to be able to fuck him high. I won't be able to not laugh at his man boobs
Only real friends lend their restraints to engagedfriends to fool around with married strangers.
Just tried to do a line with a snorkel I cut off... that is how my Aruba trip is going!