I have a feeling that after last night, i'm not just going to hell. i'm going to hell on a full scholarship. free admission bitches
his blackberry tasks were 1. take names and 2. kick ass
Two girls down stairs, two girls up stairs and....
We've got ourselves a situation
i feel like my life is a cheap remake of American Pie
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I just want to apologize for screaming when I saw you the other day. It's just that you looked really gross and I was high.
i think you broke pat's ankle when you drove over it... he's freaking out but on a more serious note i'm 99% sure i saw a werewolf
Bren left me with a lovely parting gift. Newfouund alcoholism. I'm on the kitchen floor, hugging a bottle of vodka. It's my only friend now.
Apparently you can talk a girl into leaving the bar and coming back to your tent, who knew?
I realized after pounding back 151 and head banging into each other to "the drop" of that dub step song, that we weren't meant to have boyfriends at this point in time.
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I thought my dog was a polar bear. I kept asking how the north pole was this time of year.
So is there a reason your dad is passed out naked in my shower? P.S. Congrats on the family dong.
I didn't get it..
I'm sorry. But to the original question please.
We just stood there eating chocolate chip pancakes, watching you sleep on the bathroom floor.
Congratulations, you have turned my vagina into a garden hose.
Stumbled out of my bed this morning into the bathroom at 8 am still drunk, obviously. The Mormon on my floor was in the bathroom. I could practically hear her doing hail marys for me.
While I was giving him head he told me he had to go door to door the next day and "spread the word of Jesus Christ" I felt like a Disney villain out to steal his virtue.
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