dude, mark had the least successful cab ride in history last night. took a cab to the bars, stopped at every atm in the city, none worked, then had to come back to the party to beg for 20 to pay the taxi that officially took him nowhere.
Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
Hookers taste better with whip cream
Maybe we ought to get some pennicillin too
Fair enough
he was writing an apology letter to his liver in shakespearean english... That much fun...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
found scuba porn. totally not sexy. life continues to disappoint.
Do you remember snorting allspice and yelling at doughnut shop girl?
you might as well be a hobo. you were covered in pee last night hanging out on the stairs drunk.
right. well we all have our lows.
I can't talk to her. I know entirely too much about her genitals to hold a conversation without mentioning them.
you realize you insisted on them having a dance off to korean music to determine who takes you home?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All I really remember is shouting "THANKS FOR LETTING ME MAKE OUT WITH YOUR GIRLFRIEND."
What can I say? You have this amazing power over straight girls.
She loves introducing her friends to my foreskin.
I told my grandmother all I want is a nice guy who likes to be tied up.
You know shit got weird when you watched another guy shove drugs up your wife's ass and it wasn't awkward for any of us....
The room got awkwardly silent right as i yelled "leave him alone! I know plenty of straight guys who like to suck dick!"
She shouldn’t care what consenting adults do behind closed doors
You do realize it was her husband you were hooking up with behind that door, right?
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