My mom just told me that after i turned eight i stopped growing mentally and emotionally
He just seriously used the word "skeet." Can we please find another way to get weed?
No. Take one for the team.
i fell off the bed in the middle of it, and he yelled "5 second rule" and kept fucking me. i think im in love
plan parent hood is for high school, im at the abortion clinic, so college.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you were just eating all his cookies and kept mumbling "them crumblies" when the crumbs got on your shirt.
You know, I never expected to find myself with a roommate who I'd have to ask not to have sex while I'm in the room. And yet, here we are.
the cashier ate half of our fries before she gave them to us so i think it's safe to say they don't do drug testing there
I should come with a disclaimer that reads "bad at relationships and defensive when confronted about it"
or maybe "WARNING: picks fights when bored"
Panda onesie. Pizza. Netflix. Wrapped up like a burrito. Screw you guys and your cute relationships THIS IS WHAT INFINITE HAPPINESS TASTES LIKE
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If I was a guy I'd keep a condom in my pocket, in my wallet, in my backpack, in my car, in my shoe, behind my fucking ear
Tbh I fell asleep cuddling a bag of Brazilian nuts. Franzia never dissappoints me
I accidentally called my professor daddy...and I think he liked it. Help, I'm scared.
Congrats on graduating and I'm in a cab and need someone to helps keeping me up, do you mind
half way down the stairs my legs said fuck this and i just fell the rest of the way...
Me and my boss just exchanged pictures of our bongs and such...I don't know I feel about this
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