My unemployment check should really just be direct-deposited into the checking account of my drug dealer
so chris just stuck his hand between rachel's legs and yelled 'TROUT!' and we were like...you're wasted
so I woke up this morning and on their fridge, the first item on the shopping list was my virginity.
I'm drinking vodka out of a coffee pot. and i'm not even mad about it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she used her one phone call to ask me about my day
I have hooked up with someone in EVERYONE OF MY CLASSES.
That's how you know you deserve to be a senior
He made me a period mix..should I back out now?
Why do i even want him? It's like his dick is a trophy and I need to put it on my wall of shame.
someone made her a trophy at 4 in the morning and presented it to her in the bathtub
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can't believe you big bird do not remember battling a shark last night it turned into a Pokemon battle and big bird over powered the shark
You were silly, high, and chewing on things.
It's been two whole weeks and I haven't missed a single class. I deserve 69 blunts.
I literally woke up walked into the bathroom, threw up and died this morning. Then went to my 8am.
If the smell of things stopped me from putting things in my mouth. I wouldn't be popular with Grindr guys.
I can’t believe you’re letting her use the Mercedes
It seemed like a better idea while she was giving me a hand job. It’s a good thing we weren’t having sex. Who knows what I would agree to during sex
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