I'm so drunk that I ordered a root beer at the bar. Whoops?
i guess i finally out drove tiger woods this morning..
Sorry I didn't wanna double team his sister. Having whiskey dick and watching you get laid didn't sound appealing
Just saw a woman in a hospital gown with a Steelers jersey on top smoking a cigarette while hooked up to an IV outside of the hospital. I love Pittsburgh.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
if this hangover is indicative of how 2011 is gonna be, i want nothing to do with it
I've been living off of popsicles and broth.
Called Jeff last night and told him I wanted to have sex in the airport terminal. Blackout Brooke definitely came out last night.
I feel like butter and tequila would be excellent combination. Right now. Please do this in my name.
Pissed along side the highway while waving at all the traffic... if thats not a sign of a productive night to come then idk what is
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Instead of getting a taxi some gay black guy drove us home. He is trying to break into the taxi business
Way to promote small business.
THE PRUIS IN YOUR DRIVEWAY IS NOT YOURS
excuse me?
I accidentally borrowed your spare keys a while ago...i just tried them...that, my friend, is not your car.
I need to see you idiots before I go back to school. But we shouldn't snort Crown Royal this time.
Can't we just go back to fucking and having your boyfriend think you're completely straight?
Also you think METH is on the same level of wanting to see the movie cats? We’re gonna unpack that later
There’s a child, alone, sitting on a picnic table out there, making bird noises
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