i just google imaged poop.
I would like to remind you that Mike's hard lemonade only goes good with an extra light cigarette and seminal fluid.
I can mark tailgating, going to the game and getting road head off my to do list today
I just wanted to let you know I just licked gravy off of my boobs. Just putting that out there.
The good news is the bleeding stopped. I think I'm going to sober up before I tell you the bad news though.
you vomited through the snorkel and onto the back of your head. it was truly amazing
thank you for reminding me that I stumbled into a public place drunk at 9am wearing a chicks pants.
We enjoyed our moment of partial gayness together
Tell me again your tentative move date. There are 5 Russians in my apartment on ecstasy and they are having a rave in my living room. I can't. I need to move stat
She introduced me as that girl Nathan was fingering
Hyyypothetically, what would you do if you happened to see my boobs on the internet?
Things that don't wash off in the shower: black eyes and hickies.
The cat is stealing cigarettes and my vagina cures blindness. How's your night?
Like he was trying to be sexy but he had shit taste in porn so i left
If my one night stand asked me to move in with him right after does it still count as a one nighter?
Randomize
