brb k???!! plz don't leave i want 2 tlk bout r rltnshp
What can I say...he's packing some serious heat down there. You wouldn't expect that looking at him, huh?
I guess God knew he was going to be bald...
I'm so hungover, I actually considered rolling down the stairs to avoid walking.
My RA just gave me tips on how to have discreet shower sex. Were we that loud?
I was just "that girl you seen blowing some dude outside when you drove by"
I wish I could go about my daily activities with his dick inside me
Also, putting laundry hampers on my head and pretending I'm an astronaut is a good way to get caught in every door frame in the house.
Why do I always miss the parties you're naked at?!
I get naked cuz your not there
I hope you have a dream of a sloth with my face touching you erotically
I threw up in a pringles can. how do you think my night went.
I have never thoroughly inspected the geometry of my nipples until now. How do I fix this?
Happy Halloween!! Last Halloween we spent together you got brought home in a shopping cart
Currently at a bar observing the mating patterns of drunken people in their 60s. This is hilariously terrifying. Hope he has Viagra.
I just destroyed that poor boy. Picked him up and put him wherever I wanted, it was like the Pride version of Elf on a Shelf.
There is a huge naked guy in the kitchen with the boner of a lifetime and what I believe is an assault rifle casually resting on his shoulder.
Randomize
