Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(408): View more from California

I told him it was like a man's penis, but smaller.

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(231): View more from Michigan

I just paid $5 for a shot of el toro and the bartender wasn't even hot. Rock bottom.

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(701): View more from North Dakota

I want to punch and suck your dick at the same time. I don't think we have the healthiest of relationships.

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(401): View more from Rhode Island

I figured that I'd start organizing the places ive given head. I'll add treehouse right after bandroom

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19 Characteristics That Make People Instantly Attractive
Read it at the TFLN blog
(302): View more from Delaware

you also choked him out with your legs on the kitchen floor..

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(215): View more from Pennsylvania

Woke up with two cats staring at me. One covered in puke thats giving me a look that says it might be my fault. Where am I? Come get me.

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(267): View more from Pennsylvania

Looks like a significant portion of my drinking money just became legal fees.

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(317): View more from Indiana

btw, whatever u do, dont try and take that towel away from her..i tried, it got ugly..she said some things im sure she regrets.

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(774): View more from Massachusetts

Got promoted and on my way out the door was informed that my beard makes my face perfect for riding. Today is gonna be a good day.

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