thanks...oh and i got my period
told you
oh hush
Dude I can't believe you let me go home with the wildabeast lastnight.
You always hook up with hot girls we had to know you were mortal
Some guy on the train just glared at me. So I'm drinking tequilla out of a dixie cup. Go fuck yourself.
someone, somewhere in austin has to have a muppet
Did you know the Dallas Cowboy cheerleaders have an exercise show ON Demand? Yeah, I had a lonely night
she is using a fork to eat popcorn and refuses to drink gatorade out of anything but a margarita glass... did i mention the popcorn is on a plate?
Between the hair pulling and the choking its its more like combat than sex
Sorry I have an "Operation Iraqi Freedom" fantasy
I think we've had way too many heart to hearts in the Mc Donalds parking lot for this to be a healthy relationship
Fine line between drunken accidental sleepover with your best friend's lab partner and gay sexathon. I did a cartwheel over that line. A CARTWHEEL THAT LANDED IN HIS LAP
Good, I would never sleep with your boyfriend , or send you an edible arangment
Are you the reason I woke up without pants?
Do me a favor and scream dirty things at him in a polite sexy, come hither way
What a way to start the day. Staring at penis for 3 hours
It's pretty much my favorite thing ever
What happened last night dude?
YOU SHIT ON MY FUCKING COFFE TABLE THATS WHAT FUCKING HAPPENED!!!
I woke up using a beer can as a pillow. successful party?
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