seriously this is one of those moments where im glad i dont really talk to or know the people i sleep with
Well said.
Take one last look at my face, because I'm drinking it off tonight.
Im watching hello kitty on qvc debating if its a good idea to cook bagel bites on my space heater
im not going to any frat parties next semester. for once i want them to think its actually hard to get in my vagina
You drunk invited us to do an intervention for you.
Pissing in la rieve gfox. Jer zsyuis diu drunk but it felt amazunbg
Dans le librearie ivetre. Hjhaha
How did "just two beers for happy hour" turn into naked backyard wrestling?
I need an adult. someone more adult than my current state
I see your creepy poodle photo and raise you a shirtless elderly gentleman who looks like a yetti in cutoffs who may or may not have an ENORMOUS erection.
.... touche....
Oh dear. If we're both hearing alien sounds then perhaps they're real.
I'm just wondering how Jon managed to get vomit ON THE CEILING?
You were trust falling into bushes
Is there an "I fucked your brother" emoji?
Is it immoral to trade sex for the use of his laundry room?
She asked what a chaser is. I died a little inside, please come back..
Randomize
