Im listening to a jazz version of dick in a box.
she uses ice cubes and hums anything I want. Last night was Welcome to the jungle. it wasnt lost on me shes a puma. no shame in that 30+ game.
What I'm saying is Afghanistan is America's sexually contracted disease.
I think this dress is screaming I want a birthday 3some with two moderately attractive guys. I hope.
no, i'm proud of you. this is the happiest you've been since you discovered that bowls can be used as cups if you don't feel like washing dishes.
There are eight sets of guys I've made out with who have the same name. It's like noah's ark in my mouth.
You started an entire relationship based only on sex and emoticons.
Drink a bottle I wine by yourself? Treat yo self
Talk about an dramatic entrance, girl rolled up on a stolen bike and was wearing heels and a dress, through it on the ground and said "you guys want a bike?" Of course i jumped on that shit, any sane person would!
third nipple confirmed
Does it still count as a valentine if it's drunk phone sex at 3 in the morning
I would eat the Denny's grand slam special out of my new probation officers b hole
But he's super into Jesus and I'm the devil. So we weren't meant to be
Ohhh the usual. Laying in bed reflecting on my decisions
Who did he bring home?
Idk. But did you see her shoe choice by the stairs, I'm really not expecting anything great.
Randomize
