He told me he had never done that before...I responded with "clearly"
Your brother came in a girls mouth for the first time last night... Ah the tales told whilst buying minors beer.
Question: rebounding with your exboyfriend over your rebound guy is healthy right?
Jen's arm is stuck between a wall and her bed. She's naked and needs someone to go help her.
Im going in through the window and borrowing her dog. Dont worry ive done this before. we have an agreement.
Hey! Welcome back! How was the bachelorette in Vegas?
A safari of penis I hurt to the core
It is not if she takes a guy home Karaoke night. It is how many.
SOMEONE WITH THE TWITTER HANDLE "METHLAB" FAVORITED THAT PICTURE
Was asked out on a date tonight on Linked In. That creepy genius at apple that touched my butt one time in the back stairwell. I thinks it's fair to say I've hit rock bottom.
Used my brand new sperrys as a trash can to throw up in and woke up with someone's random key in my hair...new year new me:)
The cup holder in my recliner holds a whole bottle of wine. That's definitely a sign.
Why can't you just come over, fuck me, then leave so i can get stoned and watch law and order?
I think we have some hyper-understanding of each other when drunk, because looking back at our text convo from last night, they were literally just jumbled letters.
at the time fanning him with a dish tray seemed like a good idea but when we found it buried in the dirt the next morning i questioned our judgement. needless to say he still threw up even with the extra breeze.
Yes I’m serious. I just worked YOUR 12 hour shift on 3 hours of sleep if you come over without tacos and an ice cream cake in hand we are done
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