she just waddled down the stairs behind me and puked and kind of reached for me but i sped up. does that make me a bad person?
take it from a girl who woke up with a girl in her bed... you were not that drunk.
bouncer thought i was tryin to get the license plate numbers of strippers to stalk them. I had to go show him where I threw up to get back in.
all i seem to do anymore is lay around stoned, naked and eating mangoes
Just woke up with three stitches in my left boob. Nevertheless, I think I'm going to like this school.
Blacked out at the beach and unblacked out at a piano bar singing Tiny Dancer.
Currently microwaving whipped cream to make white Russians and hotboxing the kitchen while this random kid is dancing in the corner.
Um, you were throwing up the shocker symbol in front of all of the wedding guests during the best man's speech. No wonder the groom thinks we're bad
lets talk about you, dubstep, and a bunny suit.
I beer bonged before it even hit 4 o' clock. Please get on my level homecoming style.
can we take a moment to remember my theory on 'your tongue is a snake that lives in your mouth' because we reached a whole new level of high
I cant see straight, her clothes are all over my floor and I'm covered in bite marks... No I will not go to brunch with you
I woke up with masking tape on my nipples this morning........... WHY DO BAD THINGS HAPPEN TO GOOD PEOPLE
I just threw up on the way to class. Legit, on the sidewalk by psych building.
THAT WAS YOU? Psych prof just pointed out the window and said "that kids, is why you don't pregame before class"
I think I need practice at oral sex
I own a practice facility.
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