This is evicking siegelnvs
Im sorry?
This is fucking ridiculous*
Just bought purple Ray Bans. If there was any small chance that I would ever have sex with women ever again, I just buried it.
he made me stop in the middle of the blowjob to turn the tv towrds him. i then proceeded when he stopped me again to get him the remote. fuck me.
I know we had a good night last night because his turtle was half asleep chewing on the used condom.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
WHAT DO YOU MEAN I DIDN'T APOLOGIZE? THERE WAS A PEACE OFFERING MADE VIA TACO BELL.
when you tell me you got me a birthday present, I have to assume it will show up in a drug test.
If you've ever wanted to get filthy in a Catholic church before 2 on a Wednesday, I might be your guy.
Do you hit a new low in life when you have to carry around a puke bag in your purse when you're hungover?
ANNA YOU PEED ON THE STREET. LIKE NOT EVEN SUBTLY. YA JUST SQUATTED IN THE MIDDLE OF THE HIGHWAY. And you flashed your tits to oncoming vehicles to try to get them to pick us up
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Company meeting and there he was. Felt a little weird like 'last night you were telling me how your dick loves me, and now we're listening to a report on sales figures'.
It's one am and you're asking me if you should buy a plane ticket for a booty call.
If you fold the laundry; booze and orgasms on me.
I used my mad pharmacist skills to turn ordinary birth control into morning after. I think my professors would be proud.
he was really really nice, and I did coke off of his dong that night too
I kinda just want to steal him and keep him forever
Randomize