HE had a tribal tattoo tramp stamp, jasmine.
Why do fat girls all have such cute faces?
God wants them to get laid too.
I feel like we're taking advantage of the fact that our R.A has cerebal palsey.
Oh and you pulled your pants down outside in front of like five people, held my hand, then peed.
Well, when you bump into your parents at a swingers meetup, it's time to change cities
Don't even start with me. You know damn well if you walked into a bathroom with two girls naked in the shower you would stay too. Regardless how drunk I was or whether or not you were my ride.
I was super naked---except I kept my shoes on, because I'm a lady, and I was bent over a bar.
We watched game of thrones, broke up and I drove away blasting ridin solo while he dougied
But now he's gone and I'm exhausted and my vagina is yelling at me and I want a cheeseburger
There is a drunken, assless white chick here at this bar wearing a shirt that says "REAL WOMEN TWERK FOR JESUS". I have officially had it with our generation.
Found out my grandpa had two wives and found out I'm eligible for some internships 11/10 would do acid again.
We need some Captain and Fanta. That shit will change your life. Sidenote, bring an IV drip to hook me to in the morning
I dont remember you getting a condom thrown at you. I think I had a concusion
If I take a couple more shots I won't even know he's a Mormon that drives a motorcycle
It was like mission impossible.
but with sex.
Randomize
