So I'm going back to my apartment just to get my vibrator.
I thought you were moving in with your boyfriend for the summer?
Well....one will keep me from having to pay rent and the other satisfies. I'll let you figure it out.
I just heard a girl say "We can't go that way, it is a one way street." She was on foot...Nothing worse than girl from the midwest that move to NY to "live out their dream" -the dream of living in a rat and roach infested 200sqft for $2k a month, and get fucked by some recent Ithaca college frat grad...
So tell me more about the cum that came out of your nose
Before he took my jeans off all he said was "no hard feelings from middle school right?"
the guy that filmed erin andrews naked got 27 months in jail. Every man that's seen it should send him cigs and a nail file baked in a cake. We owe it to him.
I think we should make Neil Patrick Harris a permanent part of our role playing.
We found you on the floor drooling you kept saying over and over how you were double jointed.
When a man can't even pay attention to you when you're telling him about how big his penis is, there's something wrong
I feel like we shud celebrate your sisters homecoming by having sex in her room
Nothing says happy gameday like waking up in only an ACC Championship shirt in the qb's bed with a different football player
Well. We had sex and then watched 6 episodes of Dateline NBC together; only breaking the silence to make disapproving noises at shotty police work. So basically yea I'm gonna marry him.
I mean...he danced with his dick still inside of me. What more could a girl ask for?
I love you but this is the first Saturday I have ever spent at the police station. And where are my boxers?
Dude, don't beat around the bush. We're fucked and you know it.
I'm currently watching porn and playing beer pong with wine in the lobby of a hotel with a squadron of hot airforce guys. You can never say your life is better than mine again
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