just took a shot of grandma at the fucking bowling alley... this is going to be interesting
We had sex in the woods. It was great until some bird started mimicking my orgasm sounds
So... i mean if they do have cameras in his apartment buildings pool room atleast we gave them a little show.
So, I found out he was eating a jolly rancher while eating me out.. Hence the yeast infection.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
May or may not be going home with my jamitor. i'm kiddong, btw, i have no idea. i'll let you know soooon.
whatever. i almost had sex in a car with someone passed out in the back seat. phone's not my biggest worry.
You know where a good place to spend summer is? In your head. High as shit. It doesn't matter where you are.
He never answered about passing his structures test no matter how I asked him. He did send a text saying that he would be "pouring alcohol into his head and balls" so I'm guessing he has to retake the whole class.
Dude. Cvs sells sex toys. And my discount works on them. Game on.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Got laid at work. Yes, AT work, why they let me run this tennis center by myself speaks to their poor judge of character.
She sleeps with her hand around my balls. First I thought it was just a comfort thing. Now I think it's to make sure I can't slip away in the middle of the night.
best way to lose double chin? blow jobs. I am fucking hurting.
I can't masturbate without laughing really hard at some point and it's entirely your fault.
All I wanted to do was come home from work and masturbate for national sex day... I sliced my the tip of finger giving myself a pedicure so I can’t even do that #singlelife
A guy just threw up in my lecture of 500 ppl and just got up and walked away
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