There's this guy beside me dancing with this girl with no panties on. When I looked at him he said he's babysitting his bestfriend's girlfriend since he can't come out.
What a good friend
Let's get naked and see who's stronger.
i think i would be perfectly content if, on my deathbed, i could look back on a life that didn't have any fisting in it
Maybe I'll tuck it in and pretend to be a woman pretending to be a man that is attracted to women that are attracted to women who look like men
I think in growing up..I've been having a hard time masterbating to fictional characters
bad decision 37: pregaming the antique store
And the clouds opened up and the sex gods said I hate you alfalfa
We were showing our tits to everyone because it's breast cancer awareness month and we care deeply
I thought we were doing it cause it's Tuesday
I'm figuring, since someone shoved pizza crust in my ear last night, there might be some leftover pizza.
I went back to the party but by then they were all sitting on the floor in the dark listening to we are the champions on full blast.
We are so blessed to to have nicely shaped vaginas
I thank god almighty everyday
In honor of today being Sunday I am day drinking and watching Grey's Anatomy all day. ALL DAY.
you can only text me tonight if its in drake lyrics. thats the rule
He seduced me by making me nachos. It worked.
I want to respect them as people, but really I just want to have sex with them.
Randomize
