he only lasted three minutes, so to spite him i stayed the night and slept in.
i want to bang the Snorg tees girl.. shes always smiling ;)
If she doesnt understand your inherent need to teabag an emo chick, do you really want to be with her?
I've hooked up with 3 different guys already this week...don't tell me I haven't been a productive member of society
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They found a chair, duct taped me to it, then gave me a bottle of vodka to 'make me feel at home'
I have too much pride to pick his chest hair out of my mouth again
I'm gonna make a mold of your dick so I can make popsicles
I want him to rain dance my fallopian tubes.
I think my whole family judged my ability to change under a blanket.
In a moving vehicle and other people in the car
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My goal for the night is to see your housemate's one lonely teste.
they knew we were both to shy to do anything so they got us drunk and locked us in the back yard with a tent. it was fuck or freeze
you have the best friends
On my way to get pizza I followed a dog into Salvation Army where I was just hired
I'm pretty sure I imagined the dog... They still hired me
I found her face down on the kitchen floor asking anybody who walked by for Kraft Dinner
oh so have I but I'd still suck a dick or 20 in the name of freedom.
Never in my life have I been so excited to nap as I am right now.
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