I'm gonna start referring to my vag as my ladygarden
hell yes lets make some ravioli
she's got that wholesome 16 and pregnant look.
i study at coffee shops because all these damn artsy people motivate me to work towards a real job.
nah we got kicked outta the bar after the bouncer saw us putting straws up Chelsea's nose to make her look like a walrus after she fell asleep at the table
This inappropriate post strip club text brought to you by Cheetah of Palm Beach and vodka. Blowjob in the champagne room and the clap for the low low price of your paycheck.
this speak and spell drinking game will be the death of us all.
She makes him look at her naked pics before she sends them to someone she's actually going to fuck. I think this makes him mayor of the friend zone.
Mcnellies. I'm drunk enough that you have a window. Capitalize.
I feel like Jeremy snapchattong while we're fucking is a perfect example of our generation..
So my class is approximately two vomits from the bus stop. Happy first day of class
Do you remember telling the Uber driver that "his cologne makes you want to bone"?
Are u alive? If u are, you deserve an award.
His abs are so defined he looks like a human xylophone.
Not going to lie, when I looked in the tub I expected to see what might have been remnants of a squirrel.
Randomize
