Hoooooo maaaaan
Yes?
I'm retarded. Again.
I'd do that. But we would need storm trooper helmets.
When i tried to give you something that wasn't tequila...like water....you kept saying it was against your religion.
I've always been the spiritual type.
I doubt were getting our security deposit back... the toilet just fell off the wall
No. I do not want to discuss your lesbian tendencies with my sister.
She still started it.
Text me when you wake up so I know you're ok. It's really worrisome to get home at this hour and find 3 men passed out in my room but no you. Love you, goodnight. :-)
You fell out of your barstool, I tried to help you but you said if I got any closer I'd be drinking my meals through a straw, So there you sat.
Let's just say that the best way to get a girls attention is not to slap her on the ass from the window of a moving cab.
Hey your work video crashed my computer. The 8 pornos running in the other window didn't. Congratulations.
I still have beer shits from last weekend. Dying from dysentary is a real threat at this point.
Your normalization of crazy is frightening.
I need dunkaroos back in my life.
He stole me a cantaloupe and we drunkenly broke into a park and ate it on a bench with my pocket knife. I think i need to marry him
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
The lady at the liquor store in my hometown just gave ran around the corner and gave me a hug when I came back from being gone for a couple months. My life is complete.
Randomize