So after i got done, she went over and got out her gecko, I felt like I was in an X rated geiko commercial.
birth control should be required to get into college
i really should have bought real food rather than condoms, olives, coleslaw and beer...
Wednesday. Otherwise known, to you at least, as "there are two gay men in my bed" day.
when I sang my humps to you I meant it.
Woke up next to a half eaten California burrito. It was tucked in.
Laurln. I am dying. I am npt alive. Adderrall is not a real thing. Death is a rwal thing which I understandably
Monday: I just need a drink Tuesday: OMG no more this week! Wednesday: oh shit how'd I get drunk Thursday: I'm glad you've stopped the pretenses
I said:" get your jacket, get your beer and get the fuck out of here"
Firing someone with a rhyme is the new high point in my life.
Also yeah I would definitely have to say that one of my favorite things to do is to get high and pet cats.
I don't remember much but I think I'm wearing your underwear, and for that, I am extremely grateful.
Drunk Jeff aka Dreff thinks he's about 3x cooler than be really is and about 100x better at dancing than he really is
The only thing about him that I appreciated was that he destroyed the bathroom at your birthday and missed singing to you. And we all knew.
also i don't know what you guys ate last night but he broke the toilet
We can only continue to use the "oh what's the difference between circumcised and uncircumcised" for a few more months before people will see through our lies
Randomize
