AIM automatically accepts video chats on my laptop. I found this out when I got a text from Jacob after my first attempt at drunk lesbian sex saying, "I'd give it a 7. You need to work on your positioning." I think I'm single now.
I got drunk and threw up on a kid at the amusement park. I think they're pressing charges.
He told me he was ok to drive home. Then I found him face-planted in the parking lot.
I miss the days when all my weekends consisted of were 69 and crunchwraps
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His fuck buddy just got fake tits and wants him to 'come break them in.' I need his life.
More or less binge drinking as a giant grape seemed justified
Driving by his house every hour is not stalking, it's a reconnaissance mission... How else can I confront him
He somehow pantsed the bouncer and tipped him over before cartwheeling and skipping away? Help me find him.
Notice how both of our plans for hooking up with these guys involve getting them drunk?
Oh my God, we're like men but with great boobs.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Grandpa just put 6 jello shots on his plate. My aunt tried to take them away; he flipped her off. Living in the retirement home has hardened him.
You made me take a photo of you under the stairs at the bar. "Look I'm Harry Potter."
I snapchatted him nudes and he didn't screenshot a single one of them because he's a gentleman.
Me and you. The most fucked up people on the planet drinking together. Hell yeah
Dude, I wish I could live my entire life blacked out.
Ok, as his sister I didn't tell you this but he's very familiar with pregnancy symptoms. So next time he calls you fat freak him the hell out by asking if your ankles look swollen.
Randomize