Just saw 2 very young girls abandon baby buggys in the Xwalk to fight. Gotta love Holyoke.
i dont even mind you always shaving my pubes when i pass out, i'm starting to find it liberating.
he just flipped me off the bed, said "deal with it", and came on me.
We had a 30 min conversation last night about whether or not to bone that girl with a lisp to see if she moans with one...
I'm sorry I drunk dialed you before realizing that you were already in bed with me.
She was grinding on him and then she was eating a Big Mac. Who the hell brings a Big Mac to the club?
Abort mission; I repeat: Abort mission.I found an attractive one.
I AM A HOUSE CAT. I CANNOT DO THIS LION BUSINESS WE CALL THE SINGLE LIFE
This is my punishment for trynna have a festive time with a stranger. I always forget you can't get weird with one night stands
He was so energetic. It was like screwing a bunny.
I don't think meeting his drug dealers counts as a relationship landmark.
im questioning your sanity while also accepting your reality
Despite breaking my phone, thumb, and my dignity, last night was pretty good.
I just caught my bangs on fire trying to lite a bowl while driving. Thank god it wasn't my eyebrows like last time.
I didn’t want a minivan, but I have to admit it’s made it a lot easier to hook up with the dilfs at soccer tournaments
Randomize
