if i could have babies with my dog i totally would cause i know thay would be fucking hott babies.
I can't believe he cheated
Whatever. Anytime she has an orgasm, it's because I taught him how
My dad is complaining about how his computer keeps getting viruses. I don't have the heart to tell him he needs to stop downloading so much porn.
So we were banging and she started puking all over my bed. I'm not sure what's worse, her puking, or that I felt the urge to start singing Flip-adelphia.
I think I threw my underwear away at What-A-Burger last night.
Listening to Ke$ha's new single to pump myself up for my STD test.
Sorry, I was unaware dragging you upstairs for sex was such an awful thing.
You're lucky you got out when you did, about an hour later the girl in the Franzia box started wrestling everyone.
So is there a reason your dad is passed out naked in my shower? P.S. Congrats on the family dong.
I didn't get it..
I'm sorry. But to the original question please.
I wish I were single again so I could actually have sex.
Honestly I really just want to do you in the mail truck. Thought about it a lot today
I'm playing trivia and drinking margaritas so now is not a good time.
He fed me Girl Scout cookies while I was still tied up...what did I do right?
my goal is to never have a bac of 0.0 the whole time while in the state of florida, which means i have to chug a beer before i cross the state line
Sooo does anyone wanna tell me why I threw up a cigarette this morning?
OMG YOU DID TO?!
Randomize
