I like bacon cheeseburgers and the pussycat dolls
Does that mean you want me to loosen up your buttons at carls jr?
i'm signing you up for texting rehab
what age do we have to be before we can stop fucking guys on the first date?
She said to delete the bj video, but I accidentally hit the 'send to her bf' button. My bad
he had two deer mounted on his dorm room wall with panties and bras hanging from the antlers... i cant believe i contributed to bambi's headgear...
Handjob with gloves on results in friction burn. In case you've ever wondered
I'm making a contract of things you're not allowed to put in my ass
He referred to his cock as "The cock" like it was third party or something.
Im in Ft Meyers right now looking right at an alligator. I have had a couple of beers and people are telling me not to feed him but Im gonna do it anyway.
The same guy who pierced my nipples just told me he can help tutor me in precalc.
You were running around yelling "BUKAKE!" and squirting people with a shampoo bottle you found. Total shitshow.
Hey, met you at the bar last night. You probably dont remember my name. You and your friends came back to my place, you shattered my window with your fist then dipped. Your gonna need to pay for that.
Thats where this cut came from! Thanks for piecing together the puzzle dude.
My booty call fought through ice and a foot of snow to get here. He brought booze, food, and cigarettes for three days. My vagina is the greatest motivator of all time.
I am high. And my mom surpised me today. Now i am high and with my mom....bad idea
The guy i took home was a circus freak. He jerked off 3 times in front me after we had sex. And he came every time.
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