I took shrooms, thc and molly but its okay i'm surrounded by freaks
so literally, as soon as i tripped and fell and hit the floor the earthquake started. hows THAT for a self esteem boost?
I just used 'come play with my balls' as a legitimate booty call attempt. And it worked.
Found out that it IS actually possible to get road head from somebody in the back seat
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
As i looked at his penis, it stared back into my soul. No more drinking games.
No, I am not setting up my roomba to clean up puke.
We learned a lot about one another. I showed him around the town I grew up in and he informed me that he has had a threesome and killed a cat
Don't ever give your dog some hamburger at midnight. Its impossible to enjoy a late night burger when your dog just threw it up all over your carpet. Gremlin rules work with dogs.
Remember that picture you sent me of you trying to eat the flower arrangement in the bathroom at that restaurant?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So maybe I got drunk and hooked up with him in a hot tub? I mean that's nothing to be ashamed of, that kind of takes talent. I'd drown.
Good. Need a drinking partner later. FOR AMERICA!!!
Yeah I'm at the doctors getting a shotand don't know how to tell them I'm still probably drunk from last night
It all started with a game of naked twister.
Was reaching for my vibrator this morning out of my nightstand and strained my neck muscle. I'm getting so old.
I BLEED THE BLOOD OF MY ANCESTORS WHO FOUGHT SO BRAVELY FOR MY FREEDOM
cool u want pads or tampons
tampons please
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