well i just puked at a family gathering so i can cross that off the bucket list
i just fell asleep at my computer and i woke up and in the google bar it said delicious foods to eat
Want to come to my BBQ and Blow party?
I got a job at a micro-brewery. Now who made the bigger mistake, them or me?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Are you still at the party or did I leave?
Writing apology letters and leaving them on peoples doors for your actions is NOT what I want to be doing at 6am.
Sex tent. say it aloud its amazing. promise you we rnt stoned.
I don't remember anything that happened last night past 10.. I made him buy me a Buckeye's Donut tshirt. I have no idea why he'd want to fuck me after that.
if I was any more soft right now, my penis would be a liquid
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Wanna get really high and go on a Valentine's Day Sexathon cause we're both single or would that be weird?
I just sang beautiful by Christina Aguilera to a kebab. This is what my life has come to.
Look I'm sorry I stuffed your wife's bouquet toss but I won't have that weak shit in my house.
Come over. Bring cocaine. And my t shirt with the dolphin on it.
She referred to my balls as rotund and handsome
I wish drug dealers had sales for the holidays
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