it actually wasnt that awkward...i planned on saying hello and walking away..then she asked if i wanted to go to lunch and i looked at her chest and said absolutely
I'm at a crab and wine festival with my dad. He just introduced me as his girlfriend to all of his co-workers. I am so drunk I thought he was serious.
It's 3 am and my parents just came up the driveway in a limo. They didn't leave in a limo. I'm scared to even ask.
Lowest moment of my life just occurred. I literally threw up all over myself in front of my parents.
I've got to stop making out with the guys and sharing drinks with you. I'm the reason we all get sick at the same time. Sorry.
I think my penis ruined a perfectly good friendship.
I just hate that one day I'll have to tell our children how we met, makes me look like a gold digging whore
he ate me out like 4 times and told me that my vagina "was too much fun".
I said to him "i can't have sex with anyone in my friend's living room" then he said "we can move the air mattress into the kitchen"
I don't think I bit anyone but I woke up to scrapes knees, bruises and new friends.
Ethically, this is the worst thing I've ever done. Financially, however...
Fuck I think I want to but I don't think I should. Caught between should and wanting.
just follow your vagina
Quote of the day.
She said my penis was powerful and magnificent
Dude, I danced with Abe Lincoln! How could last night have been any better???
Not to be hella graphic on main but I just came so hard I think I saw a new color.
Randomize
