i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
I wiped a tear off her cheek with my boner. It cheered her up
I gave up sex for lent.
I guess that means I'm postponing our date until after Easter.
Yeah, but there's no serving sizes for dick.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She was stumbling around looking for her cat. She said i could help, but i had to call him by his jungle name
Also: how drunk is your brother? He just left me a message as batman.
I'm in the city buying alcohol. I just got warned by a homeless man on the street that I shouldn't look so pretty "in these parts"
This little shit keeps eating the playdoh so i replaced the green with wasabi from work. Wonder what his parents are gonna think when he burns his soft palette?
Can vaginas get frostbite?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So yes we had an orgy last night and I sucked your tits while you fucked my husband but I am weird about sharing my toothbrush.
I still blew him because I won't let allergies keep me from doing what I want. But I almost suffocated like 10 times.
Just got hit on via LinkedIn..do I capitalize on this opportunity/land a job or reply something sassy
I still can't believe a guy pooped in my backyard
Where is everybody?
It's pretty much split between the strip club and jail.
We could just go to Vegas and celebrate my singlehood and not contributing to the population.
Randomize