I've come to the conclusion that as a grad student I would much rather prefer to get laid then get drunk
I think you know full well that a few years ago my stance was the polar opposite
Today at work while talking to my co-worker we both realized at the same time that last year I had a one night stand with his roommate and he was in the living room drinking coffee when I did the walk of shame. YAY.
I hate when you've made an ugly girl's day by having sex with her, and then she gets greedy and wants to cuddle after you cum.
i found your underwear in my bra... i dont even remember how this happened.
shit. all i remember is the look on your moms face.
Well he paid for dinner, so I paid for the Plan B, but the parking ticket I got is totally his responsibility.
so id say it was a successful trip...i only got hit on by one cousin...
If I had KNOWN you and mom were coming to visit, I wouldn't have passed out in the frat. This is why I hate surprises.
He's spent his last 3 years working at Urban Outfitters. No, I'm not sad I missed out on a life of mustaches, the dollar menu and shitty scarves.
There are paw prints all over my ceiling.
It's like you are the superhero of getting jizzed on
i'm about to tell me dad "sorry staying in isnt an option. i'm fucking a marine tonight."
He showed up in booty shorts and no shirt and said dont laugh dont ask questions and give me a fucking final and no one in class said anything we just sat there speehless
I'm gonna rob all up in that cradle
Hi I am on my way. I stopped and got the cheeseburger you asked for. Are you gonna pay me back?
Who is this?
Straight boys are literally imbeciles. If Darwinism doesn’t get them female rage will.
Randomize
