There's something fitting about a hot in-car interracial makeout to the tune of 'healing the world.' RIP Mike.
he used a semicolon in his bootycall text, of course he's not gonna go down on me.
they found her hiding behind the couch trying to feed a cabbage patch doll a bottle of tequila. please tell me she's on birth control.
thanks. im glad you find me better in your comparison between me and fat girl porn.
He ended up walking out of his bedroom and told me to look at the nonexistent fire he was holding in his hand. Im upset I didn't take those shrooms.
She was trying to fuck the exchange student from France. His English is really bad and the music was loud so she just pointed to a beer bottle and then her vagina.
all i wanna do is drink skittled vodka, fuck my gf, and pass out in my neighbors hot tub naked
True bitches know their best friends favorite Boones Farm flavor.
The whole movie was ruined when some chick started laughing with what you could tell was QUITE the mouthful. This of course made the guy laugh harder.
STOP WHATEVER YOU ARE DOING AND GO OUTSIDE RIGHT NOW. THE MOON LOOKS LIKE CATWOMAN
I need Mexican food. Like, I'd take it through a needle at this point. It's totally worth the track marks.
I did however clean up the cupcakes and vomit so I'm not that bad of a roommate
You gave me a bottle of tequila and introduced me to a ginger named cowboy. I actually love you.
You had sex with a guy who has a purple beard last night. No Molly for a while, ok?
But seriously like how many girls do you know that will do that on the first date?
One?
ONE! And it was was glorious!
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