Could guys at least pretend I require some amount of money to be spent before I randomly go down on them?
So can we just skip dinner and I'll just pay you for a blowjob?
Don't tempt me, I need beer money.
Any time you start making pro wrestling references before 10 PM I know that I'm breaking up a fight between you and some muscled up frat boy you call Hogan.
Banging bitches in a bar bathroom is not legit as it was in college, there are no fistpumps afterward only shame
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The puppy is a lightweight. 3 beers and he's passed out on the floor already. I repeat, the puppy is a lightweight.
Thank you as well. My penis is starting a slow-clap right now.
You never did explain why you were in wal-mart with a wok full of popcorn.
Then he said something about how from that angle I looked just like his mom.
As long as I don't spend the half the week passed out/fucked up on Klonopin and no one dies, this will be the best week I've had all semester.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just saw a herd of slutty loofahs run down the street...
i really need to shower, but i don't want to take off my bra and lose my cleavage. the struggle
How do you keep manipulating these men into helping you?
I'm a massage therapist with an oral fixation. It's not nearly as hard as you make it out to be.
Worst. Date. Ever. He peeled a layer of bread off his mini burger buns because they had "too many carbs".
I wish i didn't black out tuesday so i could have cherished our moment together
Throwing up together is NOT a cherishable moment...
I just gave a fucking twenty minute blowiob.. I'm a GOOD girlfriend.
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